One Last Word...

Elephant Fly
Karen Hallenbeck-Sikorsky-George BSRN
Friday Nov 9, 2007


They say you are large, gray, too huge to lift your legs (to the sky), and your
Face non-expressive wears a trunk, biggest sad eyes, and you live far longer
Than I do (human) or say, can I cry in this place filled with icons of hate, for
You are not in a zoo but with me, light as air, able to transcend higher, yes
Bigger, lighter, perhaps a kite lifts you too (and me) oh helium balloon bright
Red, this picnic feast is for two (me and you), my friend, I end one thought

Whirlpool of pain swirling deeper into the darkest crevice
Stirring the injury deep in my soul, could I be born again
Another mother, a new year, perhaps a place west of here
I want to love you, hold you, be within your heart (my child)

That cat is prowling on a Friday night, dark alley smells of urine, dead drunk
Bodies littered here and there (old clothing), blank faces, cheap gin, there is a
Light (police car) turning further away, and if this one not breathing stops, he is
Dead, I said dead, you see he is dead, I am telling you dead, gone, beyond this
Carnival of Vietnam memories where tiny children throw grenades and napalm
Screams searing flesh, my friend too watched his friend die, this pain needs help

Suicide is not an option, you might have to seek the stars
Ask God for His answer, ask God for guidance, you won't ask God
To take this life for somewhere in this dark dream (nightmare) you see
One frail daisy held in your hand, a remnant of hope, her lips quiver

New Year come and go, we count them in a line, almost ten, she does not dare
Disrupt the holiday supper, people are overfilled, blankly staring, talking shop or
Another plan outside of his house, he has no clue that this is not Christmas
Because our Mom is gone, we know the truth, she calls one or two (she is gone)
Sends simple cards, she says how it hurts to write (Mom please you are gone)
Away from me, us, five sisters, we do not give her away, he takes her from us

Her boots are tight, aqua blue suede, she has taken good care so they
Do not wear out, she bought those when married to Luke (the first time)
He was serving time at Sanchez, she always looks so pretty, I know she loves
(Who we ask) for her eyes twinkle, pink starlight, the audience (we) sigh

Is he twisting off in mid central nowhere, we pray for forgiveness, we understand why
The human race must numb itself out, some will run and obsess on weight, others
Will over work, make money they cannot spend, and can they pretend love to
A level they awaken next to the "one," hold them close and not care for
One second of past, the future, just now; like two young lovers they stare
Deep into dark and blue eyes, you feel God (His Love), she is gone (Mom)

A dozen roses fading faster, there is an abrasive, cutting lyric pulling my
Broken heart to bad shreds, this is something new I cannot prevent it like
Bizarre scrambled eggs, rotten eggs do not cook them, that Valentine's
Candy box is stained, that dirty old man peed all over it, don't look inside

A trail of red ants march, they work hard, they do not punch the clock but follow
A queen, if a spider comes close they will be ingested, the way of nature is
Strong, instincts to live (not die) and the emotions in her beating heart are getting
So invasive, so caustic, so painful she is ready now to pull the trigger back and
The gun is loaded, put it in her mouth and pull, can you imagine what her eyes
See as the blood explodes, her brain dead, (she is gone), pull the plug (gone)...

Do we know, can we say?
How one sees through this blood gallon,
I hear her voice singing
The telephone rings my sister said
"She is dead (our Mom is gone).."
The elephant collapsed, wrinkled trunk tucked
Deeper in turgid skin, (she is gone)...