Karen Hallenbeck-Sikorsky-George BS,RN
December 4th, 2006
Interloper came, demanding satisfaction, bill collector of the spirit
Flying higher than the red kite you knew as a boy, and treasured
Yet low enough to see, perhaps fear, never invite in, no not here
To this dark, dank, hole, this quiet and wet tunnel beneath the clean
Air, and world above all else, you have lived here for too long,
Come out, the sun will not burn your pale skin, come forth
The night is ice cold, bitter, there are snowflakes
Scurrying out of the sky, beating pathways of
Substance on the sidewalk below, the windshields
Freeze it is an early winter storm, come out...
She knows not when pain is an enemy, a faint friend, falling about her
Invading clearer thoughts, God's will and wisdom is healing if she
Remembers not to fall down, dark eyes blinded by FEAR, the tidal
Wave ended years ago, this new journey is hard for one beaten
Down to ashes, burned to dust, and left for dead in a dumpster
That is over if you let it be, join your friend, smile, he is waiting...
The wilderness is quiet, and the small fire smells
Of coffee grounds buried below, the stew you made
Caught fresh, skinned, ingested and sleep is coming
Softly, gently into your tired form, lay down, rest...
The highway is so long, tedious but brand new this trip, for it is
The last time she will venture from west to east, she will stop
Along the way and revel in how all is "new" and fresh, that the
Dialects change and never was she Texan, but she was his, all
He is belongs within her heart, and all she will be and grow is
His alone, even when sounds rise to a loud pitch, this is love...
There is a lone sparrow perched upon that telephone line, if you
Did not look closely you would miss him, for he blends simply
Into the background, he is powerful and yet silent, gentle of heart
Strong of will and physical endurance, he is able to reach forth
In the cold dark night, or stand totally still in the vapid heat of
Summer day, and not perish, for death is not his life's work
The church down the road, not far from the post office
Comes alive on Sunday, the rocky parking lot fills and
They pray in silent misery, they sing in loud joy and we
Cannot say God is NOT here, for we do not know...
She is beginning to see every long blade of pasture grass, so deep
Green, dampened with morning dew drops, the heavy summer air
Sits, awaiting the sun to rise to high temperature, and the work of
Creatures in the field continues, the chirping frog, the buzzing honey
Bees, the cow's tail smacks a horsefly in lazy motion, a stray kitten
Comes upon the field mice who escape, and hide once more...
He knew "before she knew" and loved before she
Could open her big heart to him, she skipped in the
Rain, smiled and thought she was doing right, and today
The heaviness tries to lift itself off her burdened soul...
Frustration is biting her and nagging, pushing her back to memory
God says "no" and she listens, stops her "thinker" and relaxes
Her frail physical form, to absorb HIS grace, HIS healing presence
"If only it would stop" and HE hears her cry, HE listens, and now
She must be quiet, very still, without any self-will to finally be
Touched just once (that's all it takes); trust the outstretched hand..
HE is kind, loving, and good; the taste of sweet chocolate cookie upon
My tongue, the comfort of a fire roaring in a home protected from the world
A child's innocence, acceptance, and willingness to move into HIS arms
Receive comfort, a first breath of life, a promise of earthly life to share
To be like HIM truly, not hold onto the damaged vessel of physical despair
A seagull cries in the distance, and that Greek ship slowly comes to port
"Let go my child" and the words enter this open door and
Fear battles to keep a death grip around her throat, but she does
A sensation of oneness fills her briefly, she seeks more and knows
She cannot ask HE will give in HIS time, today is a start, beginning...
Empty thoughts will become the foundation, let the mind be vacuumed
Cleared of all events of life experience, seek nothing--receive all of HIM
Be willing to love that which you hate (for it is only you), be sweet as the
Gentle honeysuckle growing freely in the forest, fly as the morning dove
To meet his partner upon the fence, do not judge yourself for today you
Are not to be again, this medicine is of conscience, and the triune God...
The pen falls from her hand, the tolling church bell is quiet
This street is unfamiliar, and the faces all different, somehow
The day is the first, there is frozen earth, scant snow covering
Blades of grass strong enough to remain, there is no time at all...
"God take all of me as you will" and the suffering stops, the body cannot
Remember what it has been cleansed to "forget" and the stars are now
Dotting the ground (not the sky) and the children are laughing aloud in
A school yard beyond the clouds and on high, somewhere not here not
Now...The fruit is blooming on flower stems, and the oak trees bear
Ice pops in grape, orange, and cherry, do you see to believe you must stop...
The Lord must receive me, release me from chains
On my knees I pray for patience, just one more day
The Christmas tree smells fragrant, it is not mine, alone
I will be until all is let go to HE who surely will save me...
God alone, no one else, can save, and heal me...
"Amen" the tears fall, stop, to fade away...
Thank you for this day...
