Gray Goose Go there..
Karen Hallenbeck-Sikorsky-George BS,RN
Friday June 1st, 2007
This heat is boiling my thoughts, they are fried like death chips
Grains of sand, feet burrowing in wet sea salt, further out waves clip
Each other back to back, the tide weaves out, the sun downs into
A horizon of distance, thousands of miles away, perhaps you have never
Felt that cool water and salt upon your skin, if so the sweat will be
Washed away, and you will sleep deeply, air conditioned room, the night
Meadows, pastures, animal scents, a barn maybe two
Amish women with bonnets, black orthopedic shoes, they
Are deep "down sullen angry unhappy" and life is too simple
Beyond the acres down to the dirt road, they do not pay taxes
Restless urge to cause them destruction, and pull them out of this fantasy
Called religion, God is kind and loving, created this perfect world and yet
Adam and Eve damaged the apple, we are living in actions of sin, we are
Not pagan queens hidden in the country, judging the many millions who
Work hard, sleep fitfully, cannot see the simple roses blooming in June
Gain weight, die young, enter heavens gate with the God who loves us all
I just could not cool down, the hottest year in eighty they claim
No air conditioning to blunt the death knife of heat and RSD, no
Disclaimer or turning back, arrived here post sepsis, frail as a reed
Empty and knowing it all (one more time), grateful for friends here
Clover abounds in the green grass, two lilac bushes without bloom, a
Black angora cat, a gray tabby, goats baying next door, freak llamas
Too many trees, and the ground holds the WET till your pain becomes
Constant, it is not much different than home but for the cooler inside
Realms of a house, deep south states you will die without it, me too
Exhausted after sleep, it would not matter, the heat kills me
Ice pops saved me from intestinal fury in Austin, poisoned
By concentration camp survivor, Jew bitch and Jew son
Rallying the Houston loop, home on a Thursday, it is too
Cleared out, the disaster appeared Sunday, you chose me
Texas, west of Austin, Midland is my home, "I hail from West Texas"
This cannot be true (it is), and somewhere eight years ago I came out
On a jet plane, to be safe with a pilot who was an angel, who kept me
Safe from the deeper harm of the living, today I thank you kind sir
With what is left of the "me" you once knew, and the "Karen" that is
Living, speaking, breathing God's will, ending the emotional violence
My eyes still turn aqua blue when I cry, and today
Tears are wasted, those who have yet to walk the path
To truth will cry many rivers, and like me they will see
Clearly enough to reach out their hand to the drowning
I cannot stand heat, for it makes me insane, I cannot work
Smile, lift an arm to do a thing, with suffocation boiling me over
Spilling me into the vat of suicide, so my ride awaits me, gassed
Up, silver steed, dark highway night will beckon and I will go
South, not east, not this time, maybe next for I SO LOVE YOU
My daughters, so want to find our peace, resolution, our heart
Try not to skip over those rocks
Baby geese waddle towards their mother
Following so slow they might die in this heat
A sound follows, gunshots, they are in the
Lukewarm water, downy feathers stop...
