Heat Wave...

Eclipse
Karen Hallenbeck-Sikorsky-George BSRN
Tuesday August 14th, 2007


The heat of summer became an outrage, homeless people die as it burns
Inside out, they walk the streets of this huge airless city, baked and left
Stuck in the pan (Richmond), no icing on this cake, they die, they lose the
Last air in their lungs, would it be better to freeze in winter's wet cold (here)
They are stiff white paste, glued to the hot sidewalk, dropping down like flies
How do I complain, air conditioning pouring on me like a spring fed pond

Emotions gyrate, turn my stomach (one more time)
This land is prison, the guards are planning to evacuate
To leave the inmates behind to starve, roast like pork on
The spit, then like Hitler to torture in the last second

No life just resolution, no beginning (this my end), no rainbow after the sun
Peeks through those thick congested storm clouds, to remind me this is
NOT home, West Texas beckons me as my skin feels that desert heat yet
Sweat evaporates on my skin lightly moist, and the song plays forever in
My heart (of love lost and yet begun again), and the men line up like toy
Soldiers. to remind me the firing squad (me) has committed the unspeakable

Forgive me my sins Father, grace my life with humility
Let the poor be fed, the dying drink cold water or they
Will perish in this heat wave, here in Richmond, Virginia
I have to remember not to forget, just today, not forever

I watch that series of a young man touched by God, he comes alive in the
End part of California (Mexico border,) and there are deep spiritual places he
Travels, the cast is human they wear the roles of those I know in my life and
I miss my husband, remember how hard it is when heroin whore whacks his
Heart upside down, and his face pale, eyes cloudy repeat the lie, it never was
Directed against me, we made a promise to live as long as we could, I will

Not forget, do forgive you, and you love me as I do you
Our children a painful scar erupting (like infection) in the moments
When we are apart, not in our mellow love that grows despite
The axes we swing, the rope that chokes us, no judgement day

The heat wave broke somewhere around two in the morning, when the bars
Locked and closed doors, and the stray drunks staggered across sidewalks
Pretending to be clear, touching stray people looking for the love that must
Come from within (self), and never seeing the Higher Power guiding them
Across that huge Broad Street to a car (not to wreck), and they make it
Home (where the heart is) just one more time, God loves us, He does, yes...

You came to spend the night, it was late and I settled into
This new routine evolving minute by minute, for a week I near
Succumbed to the intrepid heat the literal temperature broke
One hundred and eleven, and a church bell died (oh our sins)...

That little blue eyed girl asks me "why are you so tall" and I tell her honestly
"I am not, I'm just skinny and look taller" she is immersed in that solid thought
Does not believe one day she might "Jack the Beanstalk me" and be looking
Down does she know who I am (deep inside) for I am not her Mom's friend
Although I am in spirit her mother first of course, and there is a silent rose
Petal and her cheeks are wet with tears, her laughter stirs my exhaustion

Break the silence, I pray for the good in all of us, and the
Will of the Father to take us all to that gentle place we cannot
Avoid or escape, it is life, it is only here for the living so why
Do we commit suicide, desire pain and suffering instead of grace

I am done with this mixture of words that might have no meaning
I love you, and am learning today how to live this
Heart that will burst, am I you, no
More excuse I hope for rain...