Can't RUN
for my daughter Patricia Mae Hallenbeck-Sikorsky
Karen Hallenbeck-Sikorsky-George BSRN
September 26, 2007
Untie the chains, they cut and bind me, the weight of metal ripping skin
Bones scream in pain (stop hurting me), she (my mother) dropped me from her
Like a foul dump, never did she kiss my forehead, tuck me in, stay awake
As fever, childhood illness ripped me into thousands of pieces, she hurt
Me in a private place, beat me with a piece of wood, my bones cry the
Bruises are purple, black, blue "I left you Mommy good bye to you,"
Never there, you had more, I am sorry
Ten years without your smiling face your
Blue eyes whisper the love in your heart
Don't let me go (I'm here), come see
You are my heart, not one day did I spend without you, waking you up
For school, helping you be you, for each light that a candle shines is
Hope, each dark night in pain is faith, each word spoken by anyone is
Just you (I wait) and till my dying day I never left this child behind I
Forsake YOU to come to me in your male anger thinking you can BEAT
The living FUCK out of me, you bloated with an anchor of FEAR, go now go
Pastel blue, scent of lilac, you are natural
A comfort to God in HIS creation, you are
Not to be touched by the darkness for you are
That shining star that special spot in my heart
Let Monday find Tuesday alone, this Wednesday is a start, spend five minutes
On a raft floating lightly in a calm sea, sun touching your face, sleep deeply
Awaken to know (I am here) and do not let others feel your need, or take who
You are away, for only you and I can make this day, I am the only mother you
Have I can wipe away the tears and spoil you with laughter, there is a volume
Written in your name of answers (to questions) you ask each day, (I am here)...
Eat a piece of cake, let the hunger subside
Feel my arms hug to embrace it is me,
It does not have to be good bye you won't see
Until you arrive, get in your car, come to me
Roses bloom gently, frogs sound off in early fall, there are children in parks
Mothers tired of being mothers, not I. for there is nothing I'd rather be than
What you need and seek, my feelings are as clear as the sky, even fog
Will not block my beating heart (for you), and the tide may roll in and a storm
Break, but no one on God's earth can take your place, no longer must you run
See you are the victor of this race, (I am here), take just a few steps, come now
Time stops again (if you let it) and a bird's song ends
Alarm clocks buzz and repeat the boredom of empty day
Not now, (I am here), not now this pale vision fades,
I wait Patty each day I wait, let me take your pain away
Give you all the happiness I left behind, removed from you, alone, but near
Thousands of miles I walked, my feet bled, did not stop, for somewhere you
Would be standing (I am here) smiling, (I am here), never ending (I am here)
Being YOU the wonderful YOU that God made, please know the hurt is gone
Take this flower I saved, you picked it deep in the woods, your hair smelling
Of life the earth, you grew it deep in your heart, let me say I love you
Respect you, look at you
See me, but always you
Let me say this day is all
We can create, and the
Balloons will fly up high and
I will stay (I am here) yes I
Will remain...
